


Thank God for Mama Kapelput

by daggersandribbons



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Injury Kink, M/M, Major Character Injury, Nygmobblepot, Permanent Injury, Roommates, Shameless Smut, Voyeurism, cinnamon roll Ed, grimey Oswald, they were roommates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-25
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-25 20:46:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21951664
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/daggersandribbons/pseuds/daggersandribbons
Summary: *gasps* they were roommates??Gertrud Kapelput was looking for a roommate for her son, and along came Ed Nygma.
Relationships: Oswald Cobblepot/Edward Nygma
Comments: 6
Kudos: 57





	Thank God for Mama Kapelput

With a bank envelope filled with a couple hundred dollars and a brain filled with a million thoughts, Ed looked up from the newspaper to if he was at the right address. The apartment wasn’t in the nicest neighborhood but hell in Gotham no neighborhood was nice. As he headed down the stairs to the apartment he was stopped by a Hungarian woman with long blonde hair. 

“Are you one of Oswald’s new business associates?” She questioned, her accent thick. 

“Huh? No. I-I’m Edward Nygma, I’m here about the roommate ad. The garden level unit, is this the right place?” 

“Yes oh wonderful! You see my boy Oswald isn’t always the best with paying the rent. My boy is a genius and oh! what talent! and _oh he doesn’t know I placed the ad._ ” 

The door to the apartment swung open and out walked a short male with disheveled black hair who looked like he had just woken up from a NyQuil nap. 

“Mother who is this?” 

“I’m moving in.” Ed interrupted. He saw a fire in the other males eyes that generally came before a harsh scold, but instead the words that followed were in an childish whine. 

“You’re evicting your own son?! I am a model tenant! Is he going to eat breakfast with you every morning? Is he going to cook halászlé with you and watch Toby Tyler? I don’t believe he will!” 

“My darling boy, my angel-“ Gertrud stepped in front of Ed to cup Oswald’s face with her hands. “I’m not evicting you, because I know you need your own space, but we could use the money and if this doesn’t work out you might have to move back upstairs with me. Just try my dear, for me...please.” 

Oswald sighed. “Fine.”

She grinned and kissed her sons nose. “Since Oswald is home he can give you the tour, then we can all have lunch! We’ll talk more upstairs.” 

There was silence between the two men until Oswald heard Gertruds door close. 

“So, what job do you have? I’m assuming some kind of boring office job where getting a paper cut gets you a hard-on.” He questioned as he led Ed into the apartment. Leading in from the door was the kitchen, which led into the living area. Across the wall from the living room was Oswald’s room which was connected to Ed’s future bedroom by the bathroom. 

After the brief tour they headed outside and up the stairs to Gertrud’s apartment, which was richly scented with warm spices. 

“Mother I decided I will take a roommate.” Oswald announced as he took his shoes off at the door. 

“How nice dear,” Gertrud chuckled. As her son went into the kitchen to get drinks, she led Ed to the small dining area. “I hope you don’t mind, I pre-made this a while back for when groceries are low but I cooked it last night.”

But he certainly didn’t mind. A home cooked meal was something he hadn’t had in awhile, especially a meatloaf. After they all took a seat they ate in silence for a few minutes before Gertrud spoke up again. 

“So mister Nygma, what do you do?” 

“I work at the GCPD.” Ed responded and Oswald turned a sour face. Police weren’t ranked the highest on the Kapelput family list of favorite people. They always favored the wealthy and the family was anything but. 

“Don’t take this the wrong way but you look a little...lanky to be a cop. That isn’t saying much though, I can already tell you’ve got more brains than all of them put together.” Oswald said. 

It had been a while since Ed had heard a compliment beyond _nice work Nygma_ , so he took it to heart. 

“Oh goodness no I’m not a detective, I work in forensics. Collecting evidence at crime scenes and analyzing it, it’s actually very fascinating.” He pushed his glasses up with his thumb. “Where do you work?” 

Gertrud piped up. “My boy is a businessman, and he’s so very successful.” The slight grimace on her sons face said otherwise. 

“I also work for Fish Mooney, I doubt you’ve heard of her. You don’t seem like the club type.” Judging by his pale blue sweater, neither did Oswald. But Ed was starting to realize that there were a lot of things Gertrud probably did not know about her son and his life. 

After lunch and several albums of baby photos, they arrived back at the apartment. The shorter male was fussing with his hair in the mirror so Ed went to roam. He turned the doorknob to his new room, he hadn’t seen either of the bedrooms yet and was excited to settle in.

“-of course you’ll be sleeping on the couch until I clear that room ouuuttt HEY!” 

The walls were draped with some sort of black velvet and among the empty liquor bottles on the floor there was a camera and what appeared to be a dog collar. Oswald’s face was bright red as he reached the door. 

“What is all this? Alcoholic dog photography?” Ed commented. Taking another step in he saw a small chest containing several sex toys. 

“Miss Mooney pays in money and experiences, so if a business opportunity comes my way who am I to say no to niceties? You wouldn’t believe the amount of married businessmen aching for a lanky freak to think about while they’re in bed with their wives. I take the photos, scratch out my face, then exchange them with an associate of mine and she gives me my cash.” Oswald explained. The way he insulted himself so nonchalantly upset Ed a bit. 

“And do you...have sex with these men too?” 

“God no! Edward, I didn’t take you to be so sex driven! I’d never have sex with someone I didn’t have a meaningful relationship with no matter how much money they pay...again. But hey sometimes you have to skin your knee to learn how to ride a bike, so to speak.” 

The image of Oswald in that room stuck with the taller male all night, and it only seemed to amplify once it was time to sleep. He imagined him, legs spread as he sat on the floor, his blue eyes begging for all that Ed had. _Take a walk on the wild side_ , the figment said. 

As much as he tried to avoid listening to that voice, it couldn’t hurt to let his imagination roam. After all, he could hear Oswald softly snoring in the other room so it wasn’t likely that he’d hear him but just knowing he was on the other side of that wall was a little intoxicating. Closing his eyes and letting his his hand roam down his body into his boxers as he pictured the black haired male staring at him, his head tilted to the side and lips slightly parted as he stroked his cock slowly. _This could be all yours, just take initiative Edward_

What was intending to be a quick tension relief session turned into masturbation then sleeping till the morning. Stuck to his glasses was a note from Oswald that read:

“Left for work, lock up if you leave (there’s a spare key under the plates in the cabinet). Mother insisted that you have some breakfast so there’s some almás rétes in the microwave (apple strudel, best warm). I should be home around seven. ~Oswald C.” 

While Ed spent his morning unpacking Oswald walked alongside Fish Mooney holding an umbrella over her as rain dripped down onto his own head. 

“Boy what have I told you? If one more drop hits my head it’s money coming out of your pocket! I know all you do is rinse your hair and come to work, but at the salon I just came from people pay hundreds of dollars to have each strand pampered.” She chastised as they entered the nightclub. Fish headed to another room and Oswald stood at the door shaking the excess water off of the nylon before heading to the bar. 

“I heard you passed on some big bucks and all you had to lay there, why pass up on that? It’s the easiest part!” One of the waitresses said. “I don’t get you man.”

“You’re not seeing it my way. Going out to dinner gets me a free meal, sex gets me nothing.” He replied curtly. 

“That’s the exact kind of intelligent thinking I have been trying to teach you! When I found him he was in an alleyway on his knees trying to get enough money to buy his dear mother a gift.” Fish proclaimed as she re-entered the room. Oswald felt his face feel flush with shame. 

“I-I’d rather we let the past not define us.” He mumbled. There was a time he craved any attention he could get from any man with a title. It wasn’t that he wanted their love forever, just for an afternoon. He preferred the ones who didn’t ask questions, who just had their way and left. Something was so inviting about having his pent up rage and angst that ached in his core fucked out of him (or at least his rev his engines enough to start a night of drinking and socially smoking.) It didn’t even matter if they’d cross paths in public days later both would act as if nothing had happened because to the outside world Oswald wasn’t seen the way Gertrud saw him. 

She knew nothing of her boys business endeavors and she never asked. He was the last remaining remnant of better days and seeing him happy made her happy. And in theory Oswald was happy, his two worlds had successfully stayed on separate tracks but like most good things in his life that had to end. A mortgage broker and father of three had an intimate evening with him and became hellbent on wanting more, begging Oswald and offering more and more money until he grew tired of showing up at the nightclub and decided to corner him at home. 

Perhaps he would have said yes one day, had the broker not threatened the one thing Oswald cares about. Gertrud came to the nightclub to bring her sons a suit jacket she hemmed and had gotten down to the street corner before he approached. Drunk on cheap liquor and high on prescription pills he threw money at her and slurred _make him say yes_ before Butch Gilzean ran up from behind and grabbed him. He assured Gertrud it was okay to go home, waving her away moments before he finished him off as a returned favor. 

But that was then, and now after a strenuous day of being a lackey instead of a random dick to ride on all Oswald wanted was some silence. Though he was a stress eater, his appetite was non-existent as he stepped into the apartment. When Ed turned his attention from the movie he was watching, red flecks of blood were the first thing he noticed on the shorter males sleeve. Continuing the analyzation, he noticed a much larger blood stain on the other sleeve and fresh blood dripping onto the floor leaving a trail. He followed the trail like breadcrumbs until he reached Oswald’s doorway. 

“Oswald I’m sure you’re aware of this, but your arm is bleeding.” 

The shorter male didn’t immediately respond, first opening the decanter on his nightstand and taking a swig before acknowledging Ed’s statement. 

“Oh, is it? I wasn’t aware that there’s a fucking gash in my arm!” He spat as he fumbled with button on his sleeve so he could roll it up and reveal the wound. It was a bullet hole sans bullet, he had pulled the bullet out with ease but didn’t have the supplies to close the wound at work. Stumbling over nothing Oswald made his way to his bed. 

“How did this happen?” Ed asked. 

“There was a...a disagreement at work today. I-I wasn’t apart of it but happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. During my break I dug the bullet out, drank until it didn’t hurt, and now I’m here.” 

“Your break was hours ago!” He grabbed Oswald’s arm. “And alcohol is a blood thinner, you could’ve died! We need to go to the hospital.” 

“No!” Oswald squeaked. “That place is a damned bandage station, if I’m going to die I’d rather die in my own bed.” 

An idea came into Ed’s brain, drastic but necessary with the amount of blood he’d likely loss. 

“I can help you, but you need to trust me. My job is in forensics so I’m very educated in wounds.” Why he was auditioning himself for a job no one else was there to step up for he wasn’t sure. “I’ll get some supplies, I suggest you find something to bite down on.” 

Cauterization was something that wasn’t used very much, but something they were taught in school briefly. Getting to break out his scalpel kit made Ed feel tingly and the fact that there happened to be a butane torch in the bathroom closet made things so much easier for him. Oswald had managed to clean the surrounding area before Ed re-entered the room. While the torch heated the injured male placed a wallet into his mouth and prepared for pain. It only took a few seconds to close the wound but it brought tears to Oswald’s eyes. 

“I-I know that was rough. I’ll get some bandage for it.” Ed murmured. 

When he arrived back in the room once again, the other voice in his head piped up. 

_Look at him, all vulnerable. Why don’t you show him how excited that rreeaallllyy made you?_

His eyes shifted down at the bulge that had formed in his pants; he hoped Oswald didn’t notice it as he sat beside him. With the arm propped on a pillow, Ed cleaned the area once more and bandaged it. 

_Looks like he was into it too, that cut of pants isn’t hiding shit. Whoooo-boy who would’ve thought that we’d find someone into that? Never had sex with a man, but I don’t think it’d be too much work. Something tells me he’d be an attentive teacher._

“Stop assuming he’d want that!” Ed shouted, only realizing he had said it out loud when Oswald’s facial expression changed. Obviously he was the subject of that sentence, but who was he talking to? 

“Wouldn’t want what?” He took another swig from the decanter as Ed stood up to dart away like a deer. “The man who I just let solder my skin is not allowed to keep secrets, especially when I have been nothing but transparent with you.” 

“Technically I cauterized, not soldered. You’re not a metal.” The taller male chuckled awkwardly, but Oswald’s stern look did not fade. While Ed’s gaze turned to the ceiling the dark haired male caught a glance at his groin, which in his defense was at eye level. 

“Does whatever ‘what’ is have to do with that party you have going on in your pants?” He giggled. It was nice to know Oswald was capable of laughter. Alcohol was always a great loosener of lips. 

“Admittedly, yes.” 

That was all the explanation Oswald needed at that time. 

“I-If we’re being honest, I have a question for you. Are you erect due to the adrenaline or because you’re aroused?” Ed hesitated with asking, he had never been so bold. 

“Hm, I guess both if I’m thinking about it. I’ve never thought about the logistics...but definitely more so because of you. Same question for you.”

“I’d say about seven-five percent you,”

“I like those odds.” 

Oswald tapped the bed beside him but it was Ed who took the lead, leaning in for a kiss. This was his first time kissing a male, it wasn’t much different than kissing a female. He was finding that most of the beginning aspects of sex were gender neutral until it got below the waistband and that’s where he began to stumble a bit, fumbling with Oswald’s belt. 

“I can lay you down or I can walk you through how to do it, which way would you like to learn?” Oswald inquired. 

Ed felt his throat become dry. “Walk me through it, show me what you like.” He figured no one had ever taken the time to learn Oswald’s interests, and he was correct. Following the removal of all clothes, the man with charcoal colored hair laid on the bed. 

“Kiss my neck, then move downwards.” He instructed. 

Though nervous at first, Ed quickly built confidence when the first small sigh fell from Oswald’s lips. Encouraged and hell bent on hearing more of those heavenly sounds, he experimented with drawing the flesh between his teeth and biting. The experiment had extremely positive results, as Oswald rolled his hips in response and let out a sharp gasp. 

“Let me fuck you now.” No time for waiting in the older males mind. But Ed denied that request, instead trailing kisses to the collarbone and down the chest. 

“Tempting, but no.” the words tickled against Oswald’s stomach. Cool breath on the fine hairs leading to his cock made precum bead at the tip. 

Blowjobs were something Ed had never been on the giving end of, but the knowledge he retained from the few he had received (and a few lonely nights online) it didn’t seem too terribly difficult. He ghosted his lips along the shaft before they met around the tip. The taste was a little bitter, likely due to all the alcohol consumption, but it wasn’t the worst taste in the world. Oswald shivered, every fiber of being craving more. 

“I swear to God if you don’t let me fuck you right now I will shove my cock down your throat.” He threatened. Ed pulled back, a glimmer of anticipation in his eyes like an adrenaline junkie moments before the roller coaster they are on starts. Equal parts excitement and anxiety. His body nearly swallowed Oswald’s fingers as he inserted them. 

“T-Thought you were going to fuck me.” 

“Had a change of heart, figured I should give you some chance of being able to walk tomorrow...but it looks like I don’t have to, fuck bet you’ve been someone’s little toy haven’t you?”

“Actually no, you’re my first. I guess I’m just incredibly eager.”

“Good answer.”

Their eyes were locked in an intense gaze as Oswald guided himself inside of Ed. Tears rolled down Ed’s cheek, his eyes closed tight. Still they carried on, because the young male was too headstrong to quit a task while it was at hand and the older male knew from experience that something nearing two and a half inches thick (and six inches length wise) going in something the size of a penny would cause a few tears. 

Never had Ed felt so _full_. It didn’t matter that anyone had ever taunted him, that his own father told him if he moved out he was no longer a Nashton. But Edward Nygma didn’t give a damn about things like that, all he cared about in that moment was the man filling him so damn sweetly. Oswald enjoyed the wet heat around his cock, sure sex was always fun but something about the nerd under him made so much more enjoyable. 

All inhibitions were lost in the pleasured cries and sounds of skin slapping skin. For once there were no thoughts in Ed’s head other than how good he felt. 

“Daddy,” He mewled. Oswald on the other hand had a million thoughts that he wanted to say but couldn’t seem to figure out how to articulate. Instead he pressed sweat covered forehead to Ed’s as he gently caressed the taller males swollen sac with the pad of his thumb, causing him to come unraveled. Waves of pleasure rippled through his body as he watched Oswald swiftly remove his cock and shot his load onto his chin and chest. 

“Oh...oh shit, I-I’m sorry.” The shorter male murmured halfheartedly, collapsing and rolling onto the bed. Taking his finger across the fluid, Ed examined it in the dim light coming from the hallway. 

Though the moon set and the sun rose the boys stayed asleep, still worn out from the nights activities. For nearly thirty-one years Gertrud Kapelput had started every morning with breakfast with her son it didn’t matter whether he was happy, angry, or hungover. Five minutes after eight she began to get worried, his eggs were getting cold. Twenty minutes after eight her mind started to wander, what if her son was hurt? That exact fear was why twenty-five minutes later she was unlocking Oswald’s door. 

“Oswald?” She called out, but she got nothing but silence in response. The dried blood on the floor caught her attention and certainly didn’t ease her anxiety. “Oswald Chesterfield are you here?” 

Following the blood trail to Ed’s room, she was confused to see her son and his new roommate in the same bed. Rather than disturb them she decided to stand in the doorway until one of them woke up which (luckily for her) didn’t take long. 

Sensing eyes on him Ed woke up and looked at the doorway. His eyes widened and he lightly shoved Oswald.

“Huh? Wha- MOTHER WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN HERE?!” 

“You didn’t come to breakfast so-“

“So you broke into my apartment?!” 

“Oswald Chesterfield Kapelput do not raise your voice at me! I only came down here because you did not show up for breakfast, and now I find you in Mister Nygmas bed. What is going on?”

He paused. The embarrassment of the situation was too much for him, there was no subtle way to tell the mother who was afraid of someone seducing her son that her son was the one doing the seducing. But in his defense it was difficult to think of an answer with Ed’s morning erection pressed flat against Oswald’s palm, why he hadn’t removed his hand from its resting place of Ed’s groin he wasn’t sure of either; the morning was full of many questions. 

“What do _you_ think is going on?” He asked

“Well...I was guessing that my poor son had a bit too much to drink last night and you stumbled in here instead but-“

“Yes! That’s exactly what happened! I-I came home drunk and rather than let me potentially harm myself, Ed graciously offered to let me sleep in here so he could watch me.” A key part of telling a lie is selling the story, and Oswald could sell water to a fish. “That’s why my hair is disheveled, and- and why we’re both topless.” He was suddenly thankful for the cheap cotton comforter covering their lower halves. What was Mister Nygma doing in this awkward moment? The glasses wearing man was frozen, stuck between a rock in a hard place as the hand moved along his shaft. 

_First he splits you open, now he’s back for more? And in front of his mom? This man is a God._

“Or he’s the devil.” Ed thought, praying Gertrud didn’t notice the tent he was pitching in the comforter rising and falling. 

_Either way you know this is the most exciting thing to happen since...ohh yeah since someone spilled water on Miss Kringle and she was wearing a thin blouse._

“Oh, you must have been a mess my dear. He has a bruise on his shoulder.” She fretted. 

“He fell in the doorway when he arrived home.” The lanky man chirped. It totally wasn’t from Oswald biting the pale skin to muffle his own scream at some point while he took Ed’s virginity. 

Eventually Gertrud did leave, and Ed gave the shaggy haired male the biggest puppy eyes the world had seen. 

“Why are you doting?” Oswald hummed. His partner looked taken aback by that question. “Use your words. I taught you the basics mister scientist.”

If that was basic Ed couldn’t wait to see advanced. 

“I-um want your mouth on my...my erection.” He murmured, to which Oswald’s baby blue eyes rolled back in his head for a moment. 

“One: that word is much too clinical, I’m not generally fond of slang but cock is my preferred term. It paints a prettier picture. Two-“ Oswald ducked under the comforter and wrapped his lips around Ed’s cock, humming at the weight in his mouth. Why was it so simple to just tell Oswald what he wanted? 

Rather than focus on the little details, Ed ran his fingers through Oswald’s hair and stared up at the ceiling. There was a faint beeping coming from under the pile of clothes on the floor, it was Ed’s alarm telling him it was time to leave for work. 

“Oh dear, Oswald I need to leave for work soon.”

Oswald halted his movement and Ed whimpered. 

“But if we stop now I fear I’ll combust. Is there any way we could speed this up? I’ve only been working there a few months and I would like to keep my attendance record intact.” 

For that comment the man pulled away so he could laugh. “My god Ed you are so cute. Worrying about attendance when you should be enjoying yourself. Since you’re so cute I’ll let you face fuck me, but you’ll owe me.” 

Oswald’s words were always so free, he never held his tongue. Things you couldn’t pay Ed a thousand dollars to say in public. The tall man murmured a thank you as he thrust his cock down the shorter mans throat. Sounds that couldn’t be described as anything but lewd and filthy filled Oswald’s ears as he swallowed the cock like a man starved. He gripped Ed’s ass tight, digging his nails in as tears streamed down his face. 

Both feeling like one was at the mercy of the other was intoxicating to them. As Ed watched Oswald swallow the cum he just deposited into that beautiful mouth, he debated calling in sick just to stay home. 

“Don’t you need to get to work?” Oswald stated as he stood up. There was a wicked grin on his face, because he knew that he’d be sending Ed out the door with jelly legs and nail marks in his ass. The clock ticked to eight forty five and he was out the door a minute later. 

With normal traffic it was about a fifteen minute drive to the GCPD, but traffic was light so with two minutes to spare he arrived. The building was colder than usual, but to Ed it was fairly warm compared to the morgue he was currently banned from unless it was absolutely necessary. 

While everyone was shivering in their multiple layers the lanky male strutted through the building in a thin long sleeve button up. 

“Nygma how are you not freezing your ass off?” Harvey grumbled. 

“My new roommate keeps the apartment frigid, it’s like we’re penguins.” Nygma chuckled. Taking a sip of coffee as Ed walked away, Harvey muttered under his breath about how his co-worker was walking like a damn penguin too. Like the day after a vigorous workout, his movements were a bit strained. 

Mundane work tasks were more exciting knowing that he had something living to come home and interact with that had a longer lifespan than the Comet goldfish he once owned. Since the day was slow Ed decided to ask his co-worker Kristen for a favor. 

“Why would I give you the key to the file cabinets? Do you think I’ve forgotten what you did two weeks ago?” Miss Kringle turned to face Ed. “Plus it’s a different key for every cabinet.” 

“I-I apologized for that! Please, I’ll- I’ll let you take my lunch break on any day you want.” He bartered. The woman paused before retrieving her keys. 

“I’ll unlock it for you, just tell me the last name.” 

“You see that’s a problem. I’m not sure if it’s a C or a K. The mother spells it Kapelput but I think her son spells it different. All I know is that he works at a nightclub owned by Fish Mooney.” 

Lucky for him Fish was in the habit of hiring people that didn’t have the cleanest records and two detectives had a running bet on how many crimes her crew would commit throughout the year, which included a file with each known employee and their crime histories. 

Oswald Chesterfield Cobblepot.   
DOB: 07/26/77.   
\-   
12/20/94: THEFT>$500 Jail: 67 days  
07/30/95: AGGRAVATED ARSON (charges dropped), UNDERAGE CONSUMPTION, PUBLIC INTOXICATION Jail: 14 days   
03/29/99: AIDING/ABETTING Fine: $1000   
04/21/99: DRUG POSSESSION Jail: 16 days, Fine: $300  
08/02/02: BATTERY charges dropped  
08/15/02: BATTERY charges dropped 

There was more on the page but it appeared as if someone had purposely spilled ink on the remainder. Be that as it may Ed learned a lot about his roommate. 

“Is this the person you’re renting from?” Kristen questioned, her tone had changed to a softer, more caring one. “You’re not safe there.” 

A sick laugh came up Ed’s throat. “Don’t play the sympathy card. I’m not in danger, and even if I was would you offer me a place to stay?”

Her silence was the only answer he needed. It was always comical to him how people said things they didn’t mean. She parted her lips to speak but he left the room before she could say another word. Having the information he needed, Ed left the room and went on with his job; but Miss Kringle wasn’t satisfied with that. He had been obsessed with her and now the idea of her help was laughable? Something was off and she intended to figure out what. 

~

“If working for Fish is so bad why don’t you quit? Surely an intelligent man like you could find another job in a heartbeat. You could be a politician!” Ed asked over containers of Chinese takeout. His day at work was over and now he was in his comfort zone in pajamas.

“It’s complicated.” Oswald sighed, hoping to cut that conversation off there but he should’ve known Ed would press further. 

“Complicated? Like a riddle? Do you like riddles Oswald?” He inquired. It was obvious that words weren’t going to be enough to shut him up. Actions were necessary, so that’s why he stuck his hand down his own pajama bottoms and let out an obscene moan. “A-Are you masturbating to get out this conversation? Do you think I’ll see you masturbating and want to fuck?-“

Standing from across the table, Ed made his way over to the other man and crouched beside him. “-I don’t want to fuck, I want to talk to you.” 

Oswald pouted. He was in no mood to have a conversation about his emotions, not that he’d have a clue how to begin one. Still there was a glimmer in Ed’s eye that told the older man that if he pushed a little more the door would open, so he pounced onto his roommate and kitten licked his neck. 

“Fine, but only if you agree to talk after.” Ed feigned inconvenience. Oswald nodded happily. The younger male knew what would get the bird to sing. 

When Oswald attempted to make a move, Ed quickly pinned him to the ground. It was his turn to take charge. With his free hand he cupped the mans face and planted a kiss onto his lips. 

Being nearly split in two by a cock didn’t make Mister Cobblepot blush, but a simple kiss from Ed had his face candy pink. Like a deer caught in the headlights Oswald was caught in a fight or flight situation. 

“Oswald. Look at me, all you have to do is focus on me. You don’t have to worry.”

“ _Just take it like the slut you can be._ ” 

Ed cringed at the voice in his head. Though Oswald couldn’t hear, he was still embarrassed that he would say something so ungentle knowing the intention was to gain trust. 

“Are you alright?” Oswald inquired, a look of worry on his face. 

The Riddler chuckled in the far reaches of Ed’s mind. 

“I’m just peachy, and you- you are stunning. You’re so beautiful, I am so lucky to have met you let alone having the honor of making love to you.” 

“ _But I wouldn’t consider this making love, this is much more depraved than that._ ”

“And I mean it. You are stunning. Y-Your eyes are like copper benzoate.” 

Oswald rolled his eyes at Ed’s nerdy compliment. 

“ _Blue like your lips will be when you’re choked until you unravel._ ” 

“And now I’m going to love you senseless.” both sides of Edward Nygma promised in unison, sliding into Oswald. As sentimental as Ed tried to be, the Riddler was right in knowing that the raw heat would drive him mad. 

The older male kept his hand on Ed’s shoulder, gripping it to make sure he didn’t just ram into him. Once he was bottomed out they let out sighs in unison. Those sighs quickly turned to moans, which turned to laughs as Oswald was fucked into a giddy state. For once the other side of Ed was silent, he just stood to the side and admired. 

“I love you Ed!” gasped Oswald, causing Ed to pump ropes of cum into him without warning. His declaration was quickly set to the side by the realization of what Ed had done. It hadn’t been discussed yet, whether it was okay to finish inside and judging by the stunned look on Oswald’s face Ed was guessing it wasn’t okay when in reality all Oswald cared about were the words he just said.

“Are you alright?” Ed questioned. 

“Alright? Y-Yeah I’m fine. Are you?” 

He looked himself over and nodded. A gentle kiss was pressed to the tip of Oswald’s nose, which proceeded Ed standing up to stretch. 

“By the way, I love you too.”

Two weeks had passed and while for some that wasn’t much time for Oswald it was an eternity. No man had given put this much time and effort into a relationship with him, and it felt nice to feel so wanted. He was starting to think Ed might be right, maybe working for Fish wasn’t in his best interest. At least that’s what he said when he was confident she wouldn’t hear it. 

“Miss Mooney, looks like you’ll be in the market for a new umbrella boy within the week.” Butch stated as Fish sat at her table.

“Pardon me? What employer is snatching him away?” She questioned. Talking as if he wasn’t in the room was one of Oswald’s biggest pet peeves and they all knew that.

“Not sure, but judging by the scratches on his back and the bruises on his neck I’d say it’s a tough job.” 

Fish’s gaze felt like daggers in Oswald. She motioned him forward and instructed him to reveal the hickeys and scratches Ed had left on him. 

“So you’re threatening to leave on the notion that someone will stay interested in you for longer than a month? What about you is more special than any common whore off the street?” 

Oswald felt his stomach twist in anger. Sure he was already planning to conspire against Fish, but he didn’t want to upset her this soon. 

“I’m a valuable asset and you don’t see my potential. I don’t need you.”

The room filled with laughter. After that low blow to his self esteem, he was let go for the evening. Just as Oswald reached the stairs to the apartment he caught a whiff of pine and mint. Turning on his heel he barely caught a glimpse of their faces before he was knocked down the flight. 

Falling down some concrete wasn’t the worst part of the punishment Fish Mooney had sent his way. He was thankful he had actually blacked out, or else he’d remembered how his leg got so mangled. When the black haired man came back to reality, the searing pain that radiated throughout his body as he tried to stand rendered him incapable of doing anything but openly sobbing as he leaned against the front door. 

Ed bent down to tie his shoe before heading out of the building. 

“Hey Nygma! Glad I caught you before you left, got a second?” Jim Gordon questioned. 

“I can crawl, I can fly, I have hands but no legs or wings either. What am I?” He replied. 

“...Alright great. Actually I’m feeling thirsty, want to go to the bar? My treat.” 

Ed wasn’t invited to after work activities unless it was work mandated, especially not by someone as liked as Jim. One drink wouldn’t kill him, and surely Oswald would understand him coming home a little late. 

Beer wasn’t his favorite, the taste and smell of carbonated yeast reminded Ed of some unsavory people, but since it was purchased for him he wasn’t going to waste it. 

“So, a coworker of ours is...a little worried about you.” commented Jim casually, popping a pretzel into his mouth. 

“That’s not uncommon Jim, may I call you Jim? Harvey says that at least twice a week.” Ed chuckled, but the blonde didn’t seem to find that funny. 

“Kristen Kringle seems to think that the people you’re living with are dangerous, and she’s not wrong. Your roommate has been in the system many times under several aliases, you aren’t safe.”

To that Ed laughed, he laughed a sad, dark laugh. 

“I’m not safe? I’ve never been safe until now. I grew up afraid to come home, then once I moved out of there I was so poor that I was living in my car. Day in and day out I came into work hungry and scared, but no one worried for my safety then-“ another dark laugh “-in fact, none of you have ever been on my side. Sure you and Bullock tell the others to lay off me, but I hear you talking behind my back. ‘He’s not right,’ never maybe he needs a friend. I don’t care what you heard about him, I know that he’s better than any of you. Now if you’ll excuse me, my roommate is probably worried that I’m not home yet. Have a good night Jim.” 

The apartment door was wide open but that wasn’t the most alarming thing for Ed, it was the sound of wailing coming from within. He followed the sound into Oswald’s room to find Oswald lying in bed being embraced by Gertrud while she cried. Just as quickly as he was about to ask what was wrong, his eyes flickered down to the position of the mans legs under the blanket. Gertrud stood, wiped her tears, and ushered Ed to the hallway.

“My darling boy, he was attacked. He made it into the apartment all the way to living room before I came down here. I-I only came down because I heard him collapse. He won’t tell me what happened,” she whispered, her voice cracking. “my boy is in so much pain and he won’t let me help. What do I do?” There was so much pain in her voice. 

“You must be tired Miss Kapelput, this has been incredibly stressful for you. How about you go rest on the couch while I talk to him?”

 _It's okay in the day, I'm staying busy. Tied up enough so I don't have to wonder where is he._ A small bedside radio sang. The words seemed to mock him, Oswald probably wondered where Ed was and he had been at a bar with someone he didn’t even care about.

“Oswald...you don’t have to talk right now. I’ll get your mother to go upstairs, you just rest.” Ed murmured. 

Oswald listened through the wall to his mother and Ed’s conversation. The pain in their voices hurt him. They just wanted answers from him, but that was something he couldn’t give. He feared that if he opened his mouth to speak a scream would come out instead. His mother had splinted the leg but he’d need Ed to elevate it just a bit to promote blood flow. So he did what he always did in a time of pain: drink until it didn’t hurt so bad. Gin wasn’t his favorite but it had been a gift from his mother and it seemed rude to waste it. By the time his roommate came back he was fast asleep, the bottle just seconds away from pouring onto the floor. 

After making sure the leg was elevated and that his roommate was properly covered by blankets, Ed laid in bed beside him. Not that he slept much, every time Oswald shifted in his sleep the tall male was awake to make sure that he was alright. 

While his leg (and ego) healed, Oswald was put on bedrest. He had often said that he would be perfectly content by himself, but it turns out it only took three days for cabin fever to set in. 

**That silent sense of content that everyone gets  
Just disappears soon as the sun sets.**

“Honey I’m home!” Ed jokingly called out as he entered the apartment. 

“Did you bring food? I’m starving!” Oswald whined from the bedroom. The taller male chuckled as he hung his coat by the door and headed into the other room. 

“I thought I made sure to leave you plenty of snacks-“ he paused to uncover Oswald’s leg to check the swelling. “-but you’ve been a hungry little bird haven’t you? No I didn’t bring home any food but I can make us something, what would you like?” 

The pet name brought a blush to Oswald’s cheeks. “Pasta? Its quick and filling.”

The couple laid in bed beside one another, Ed reading a book while Oswald read the paper. Paper rustled as the newspaper was sat down. 

“Have I ever told you how handsome you are?” The older male purred. 

“Not recently no,”

“Mmm, yeah. You look especially handsome when you are naked and your hair is all sorts of tousled from me pulling on it.” 

“How much have you drank today?” Ed joked.

“Only half of the bottle of wine you allowed me to have, which was shit by the way. But all day I’ve had nothing to do but imagine your thick cock filling me.” Oswald’s words were like smooth caramel, simply irresistible. The logician in Ed thought otherwise, reminding him that Oswald couldn’t exactly get on his hands and knees. 

“It’s simple, just make him lay on the right side of the bed. That way his leg can still rest but his other leg can be angled off the bed far enough for us to give him what he needs.” 

Almost instantaneously the older male had wriggled his underwear off, he was nothing if not eager. The sight of Oswald’s cock at full attention was inspiration enough for Ed to get where he needed to be. He wasted no time, grabbing the nearly empty lube bottle from the nightstand. 

“I-ungh-told you to purchase a bigger bottle than that.” Oswald chided. It was amazing how he still managed to be sarcastic even with two fingers being craned inside of him. 

“That store you gave me the address for was practically screaming sex dungeon. I went in, I grabbed the first one I saw, and I got out.”

“I’d never send you to a sex dungeon, not without me. Especially not one on that side of town, you’re not ready. Also I’m incredibly territorial.”

The mental image of Oswald in a seedy sex club half thrilled half angered Ed, but that was a fantasy for another time. No reason to fantasize when the real thing was aching to be loved. He glided into his partner with glee, fitting into him like puzzle pieces. Slow and steady they made love, until they unraveled together. 

Fully convinced that his companion had gone to sleep, Oswald retrieved a small metal tin out of his nightstand. In it contained a baggie of ground up marijuana, a lighter, and a small metal pipe. Honestly he knew Gertrud would be more upset to find out he was doing drugs than what he really did at Mooneys, but it wasn’t like he did it every day. Just on the days he really needed to decompress and alcohol was unavailable (or when incredibly drunk, one of the two.) It was a risky move but he knew for the sake of both of their sanities it’d be worth it. 

Bring the piece to your mouth, light it, inhale, exhale: four simple steps that brought Oswald momentary peace. His eyes flickered over to Ed, still sound asleep. 

When the flint was struck a second time the taller male woke up, the smell of smoke filling his nostrils as Oswald stifled a cough. 

He turned his head and squinted. “I don’t mind if you smoke, but please don’t do it in bed. Obviously I’ll make an exception so just aim your smoke upwards.” He grumbled before turning to his other side.

**Soaked in soul, he swims in my eyes by the bed. Pour myself over him, moon spilling in. And I wake up alone.**

Ed never wanted to wake up alone again and he didn’t have to now that he found Oswald. He decided to take a few days off and devote them to helping the injured bird heal so he could fly higher than before. 

While he was finishing up breakfast dishes one morning, a loud knock on the door startled him and nearly caused a broken plate. 

“What is my mother knocking so loud for? She has a key, Eddie be a dear and see what she wants.” Oswald called out from the bathtub. But at the front door was not Gertrud, it was Jim and Harvey. They looked almost relieved to see him. 

“Jesus Nygma you cant just pull this kind of-“ started Harvey before being interrupted by Jim’s “where is he?”

“Who? Oswald? What does he have to do- wait why are you here? How are you here? I haven’t even updated my address in the system yet.” Ed questioned, one hand on the door ready to shut it. 

“Listen you’re not safe here. Kringle is right, for once. He’s no good, you’re better than this.” Harvey warned. 

Kristen Kringle, why all roads led back to her Ed would never know. He tried to love her and she rejected him, he moved on and she suddenly wouldn’t leave him be? She meant well and deep down he knew that, but had she gotten the benefit of the doubt too many times? 

“Better is a subjective term. I will be at work tomorrow at my normal time, perhaps earlier. That’s all you can ask of me.” The detectives had never seen Nygma stand his ground like that before, something was definitely off; but he was right, without a warrant they couldn’t do anything. 

Jim paused before talking, thinking carefully about his words. 

“Alright, then we’ll see you tomorrow.” 

Harvey waited until they were back in the squad car to question Jim’s judgment. How could he just let Ed go? 

“When we get back I’ll start working on the paperwork for a warrant, that way we can streamline this and nab Oswald while Nygma is at work:” explained Jim. 

The moon rose and fell, and the sun was creeping back in the clouds as Ed made an early morning visit to one Miss Kringles apartment. Still in her pajamas, she hadn’t even finished her first cup of coffee. Her usually pristine auburn locks were tousled from sleep. Once upon a time he would’ve given anything to see that sight. 

“Ed? I’m so glad you’re okay!” She exclaimed. “Jim didn’t tell me if he saw you yesterday. Please come in, I just made coffee.”

“I can’t stay long, still need to go to the bank before work, but I can stay can for a cup.” 

So he stayed for a cup of the finest cup of coffee Kristen Kringle had to offer and not a drop more, but it was only polite to rinse his own cup out in the sink before leaving. 

“I don’t get it.” She stated. Ed looked up from the running water. “I mean I was flattered when you only had eyes for me, but now you’re obsessed with that and frankly I’m questioning your taste.”

Realizing her words came out as harsh as they did, she quickly worked to make amends. 

“Ed I’m sorry-“ 

As he reached for his coat Kristen grabbed his arm, pulling him into a kiss. Ed didn’t resist, the side of him that had dreamt of this all along was in heaven. They moved to the wall, his hand on the small of her back. She moved to start unbuttoning his shirt and his hand snaked up to her neck. 

Her smile fell to a frantic gasp as Ed’s hand restricted her breathing until she no longer resisted, her body falling onto the ground when he released. 

“Oh dear-“ 

Getting the body in the car undetected was the easy part, but dragging it down the stairs and into the apartment (while fumbling with the keys) was the difficult part. 

Oswald was sitting in the kitchen eating some toast and he was perplexed to see his roommate home so early, and more so to see the dead body he was doing a shit job of hiding. 

“So Eddie-” he hummed, taking a bite of his toast and thoroughly chewing it before waddling over to his counterpart. “Are you going to introduce me to your friend?”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading this! When I started writing this 46 days ago I was very unhealthy and living in a toxic situation, but now I hope I’m getting better (I’m certainly living in a more supportive area)
> 
> follow me on tumblr: girlwiththetechnicolorheart


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